Starting my New Year resolutions now

My life in the last year and a half has been amazing within my marriage. My health, stress levels, financials, and so on need some repairs.

I have had back pain and migraines since my childhood. My migraines are always hell the ONLY thing I could ever get to relieve them was a shot at the E.R. My back pain, no one wanted to do anything but give me muscle relaxers. In September I had enough! I couldn’t get into my Doctor so settled with our Nurse Practitioner. She did the usual “here’s your script” she had a shocked look on her face when I told her  I did not want a single pill until the source was found.She ordered MRI’s and Xrays, I have mild disintegration from my neck down, several bone spurs, several herniations and arthritis. It is believed that the spurs in my neck are what is causing my migraines. My medications did not change but I do not feel crazy when explaining my pain, there is no mystery. I now have to learn stretches, relaxation techniques, and my limits.

When I met my Husband I was a size 3 at this time we were just friends and I was working at a job where I was running 10 miles a night gathering foam and seat covers for Toyota Highlanders. A month before we started dating I had given birth to our daughter (he adopted her)  I was a size 5. Slowly, as I became content in my life my weight spiraled out of control. I went from 135 pounds to now 175 in a year and a half. My diet is crap. My Husband and his daughter are the pickiest I have ever met. He loves veggies but hates cooked veggies, he hated casseroles, he hated anything with sour cream or cottage cheese in it, he hates cream of mushroom and much more. Luckly, he has worked with me and has started to try different things. The bonus child…. no so much. She thinks she hates everything. If she had her way we would just stock Mac N cheese, biscuits and gravy, grilled cheese and tomato soup, Pizza, and lunchables. She will eat spaghetti but put spaghetti sauce on any other noodle she freaks. Getting her to try new foods you would think I was trying to poison her. I hate gotten her to try new foods and she reluctantly admits she likes them. Sometimes, I lie about what’s in it until her plate is clean but she still will hold on to her “I hate that.” So with these two, finding something healthy and well balanced is complicated.

For the most part of our life together, I have not had to work outside of the home. My husbands business is doing and until issues arose with our Exs we were living well. $7,000 in lawyer fees is not something you want to deal with right after you pay your house off and right before the holidays. We are struggling to pay bills and keep our sanity.

It’s time for a change! Now more than ever I need to feel better about myself and our situation. I’m going to lose weight, I’m going to better my sanity, better my marriage, better my family, my finances,  and more.

Changes –

  1. Start a savings plan for Christmas next year
  2. Start a cleaning schedule that will help me not feel overwhelmed
  3. Start a workout schedule
  4. Sleep schedule… I need to get up at 3:30 A every morning and bed by 9P
  5. Mental wellness
  6. Morning routine
  7. Be a better step-parent
  8. Journal more –

Regaining my Vigor – Day 1

 

 

 

 

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Promises

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We have all made a promise at one point or another, some over use them.

I promise to love my children til my last breath.

I promise to love my husband until my last breath.

I promise to do my part to raise my step- children and love them as my own.

I promise to never give up on making the best life for my family.

I promise to never relapse into my meth addiction ( 16 yrs clean)

I promise to never make a promise I can’t keep.

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I promise you, this is the last time. Who are you kidding? If you wanted the behavior to stop… you would stop it. I always cringe when I hear this one. It screams desperation. This person is addicted to something and not ready to give it up. Drugs, control, attention, who knows but that person is not giving up the habit anytime soon.

I promise if you… Nope! A true promise is unconditional no strings attached. I hate hearing kids being made promises if they are good. The person making the promise holds all control, they can find that minute way out.

Promising the material things – There’s always an excuse.

Political promises – Straight up BULL-SHIT! You can agree with their stances or their record but if you believe a promise…you my friend are a damn fool. Do you really believe that someone who has been in politics somehow (even Trump has enough money for pus and pull) is going to fulfill their promise? All of them have been in a position to change things re-electing them or electing them to a higher position is NOT going to change that.

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Marriage is a promise. Marriage is not always easy. I always promised myself that my first would be my last. I didn’t end my first one but I’m thankful for my second chance at life. It sickens me how marriage is more of a status with this generation. I know of a girl who in the last year has married two guys twice. Why?

My husband is my partner, my best friend, my equal. As a team, we run this household. He is the breadwinner, not my ATM. My love for him is unconditional. Do we fight? OH YES! We do not agree on everything, life would be boring if we did. Even on the rough days, I am proud to walk through this life with Jeffery. I love him because he challenges me. I love him because he loves me even on days that I do not love myself. I love him because he doesn’t promise me the world. He instead makes sure that we build our world together.

Together we promised

To be honest no matter how hard the truth is.

To be faithful

To make decisions together

To give each other space

To never try to change the other

To start each day as a new…no argument carries over to the next day

 

 

via Daily Prompt: Promises