Regaining my Vigor – Day 2

Changes never quite work as planned. My alarm was set to get up at 3:30 it just didn’t happen. My dear husband was up at least 4 times last night and ended up on the couch. I debated getting up and downing coffee but realized that with him on the couch, I couldn’t start any cleaning or anything productive. It’s 8 am and he’s still sleeping poor guy.

Workouts – 5 min Pooch workout – I didn’t make it through. Got my one minute plank – talk about burn. I got the reverse crunches and mountain climbs in. The scissors and elbow to knees didn’t fly it seems as if they are too much for my lower back issues. I’m not giving up, we will try again tomorrow.

Bedtime glutes are getting passed up again tonight… I think I’m going to add them to my morning routine.

Journal more – The seven ways he won my heart

21 day wellness challenge – Link here – I’m on day 3 but due to a crazy crazy day I skipped to 4 and will do 3 tomorrow.

Cleaning schedule – I have been overwhelmed so long. This is nice..and more motivating. Cleaning schedule

Savings plan – Won $100 on a scratch off $1 going in the jar and the rest on this Christmas. So far Jar is $2 + change in jar (estimate $15 total)

Obviously, my 9 P bedtime didn’t happen again tonight. I’m going to read for the next 15 minutes and head my tail to bed.

I feel better today. I feel more positive…the change is still new but I think it’s going to work.

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Regaining my vigor – Day 1

The seven ways he won my heart

I was alone and in denial. I thought I was happy going through the motions of being a single mom. He was my friends ex husband, I knew she was in the wrong but I didn’t feel comfortable crossing that line. No pressure – #1

I started seeing a guy I met online. He realized before I did that this guy was a douche and let me figure it out on my own. He didn’t stop talking to me. He didn’t try to interfere. When I got pregnant and Makenzie’s bio-dad wanted nothing to do with her, he offered to be there at her birth and sign her birth certificate (I turned him down.) When my son’s father made my life hell, you listened to every single rant. We talked everyday several times a day. My best friend- #2

My Truck is a beast a beast that is scary on ice or with out brakes. I was driving 30 minutes to work every day, leaving work at 2 AM. If there was ice on the road I always had a text or a phone call as soon as I got in my truck “call me when you are home safe.” If the roads were bad and I didnt get home til 3 am he was still awake waiting for my call. When my brakes needed changed but it was sleeting, he still crawled under my truck and made sure my truck was good. He protected me – #3

Father’s day 2015 – My back brakes went out. I hated asking and I didn’t have to as soon as he knew they were out he told me to go buy them and get to his house. I sat and watched him busting his ass for me, my truck didnt make it easy. I sat playing with his daughter all day. Everything felt different. We went for a drive to make sure it was all fixed. At some point I decided that this man has been patient for a year and a half and deserved a chance. We pulled into his driveway and I asked Jaden to run into the house. That kiss – #4

We had a long talk that night. We both said we wanted to take things slow. The next day, I ran my errands and around 7 Pm I just had to see him. I drove to his house without telling him. He opens the door and has the most genuine look of love, he tells whoever he was on the phone with he had to go and hung up. He grabbed me into the most amazing hug I have had in my life. That look – #5

A few days later, I was going in to have my tubes tied. My friend Ashley was going with me, he wanted to be there. He went in with me until they took me away. Ashley said, he sat there holding Makenzie like his own. Pacing every 15 minutes. Asking every nurse that came by if I was okay. When I was headed to recovery, one of the nurses asked if he was my husband. Ashley said, he had a tear in his eye and said yes. He won my friend over – #6

After my surgery, he took care of me. Since he has Jaden Thursday – Sunday we would stay at my house through the week and his house on the weekend.The second weekend at his house, with his daughter, a few friends, his brother, and his brothers girlfriend on our porch…. he puts a bread tie on my finger and asked me to move in. Made me cry – #7

More later on how he kept it…

Regaining my Vigor – Day 1

via Daily Prompt: Vigor

As I stated Here things have to change… I will post my progress daily.

My financial plan – Christmas time is chaos, we never seem to save enough money. Today is the day I begin this savings plan. Day 1 – $1 plus whatever change is thrown in the jar

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Cleaning schedule – Working 40 hours a week, maintaining a happy clean home can be overwhelming. I’m going to give this a try – today was a day of running errands and chaos. So Tomorrow will be the start.

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Workouts – For the next three days I’m going to work on these and start a 30 day plan on the first. Day 1 – I’m at 175 lbs

5 min pooch workout – Done

Bedtime glutes –

Sleep pattern – Working days I need to get up at 3:30 Am… I need to make this a days off routine too. Tomorrow… I promise.

Mental wellness – Ohhh do I need this. I’m actually on day 2..

21 day mental wellness challenge – Day 2

I’m thankful for my Husband, my children, our home, coffee, my job, second chances, a warm bath, memories, low fuel prices, and Xmas deals.

More changes coming  – look back tomorrow for Day 2

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Starting my New Year resolutions now

My life in the last year and a half has been amazing within my marriage. My health, stress levels, financials, and so on need some repairs.

I have had back pain and migraines since my childhood. My migraines are always hell the ONLY thing I could ever get to relieve them was a shot at the E.R. My back pain, no one wanted to do anything but give me muscle relaxers. In September I had enough! I couldn’t get into my Doctor so settled with our Nurse Practitioner. She did the usual “here’s your script” she had a shocked look on her face when I told her  I did not want a single pill until the source was found.She ordered MRI’s and Xrays, I have mild disintegration from my neck down, several bone spurs, several herniations and arthritis. It is believed that the spurs in my neck are what is causing my migraines. My medications did not change but I do not feel crazy when explaining my pain, there is no mystery. I now have to learn stretches, relaxation techniques, and my limits.

When I met my Husband I was a size 3 at this time we were just friends and I was working at a job where I was running 10 miles a night gathering foam and seat covers for Toyota Highlanders. A month before we started dating I had given birth to our daughter (he adopted her)  I was a size 5. Slowly, as I became content in my life my weight spiraled out of control. I went from 135 pounds to now 175 in a year and a half. My diet is crap. My Husband and his daughter are the pickiest I have ever met. He loves veggies but hates cooked veggies, he hated casseroles, he hated anything with sour cream or cottage cheese in it, he hates cream of mushroom and much more. Luckly, he has worked with me and has started to try different things. The bonus child…. no so much. She thinks she hates everything. If she had her way we would just stock Mac N cheese, biscuits and gravy, grilled cheese and tomato soup, Pizza, and lunchables. She will eat spaghetti but put spaghetti sauce on any other noodle she freaks. Getting her to try new foods you would think I was trying to poison her. I hate gotten her to try new foods and she reluctantly admits she likes them. Sometimes, I lie about what’s in it until her plate is clean but she still will hold on to her “I hate that.” So with these two, finding something healthy and well balanced is complicated.

For the most part of our life together, I have not had to work outside of the home. My husbands business is doing and until issues arose with our Exs we were living well. $7,000 in lawyer fees is not something you want to deal with right after you pay your house off and right before the holidays. We are struggling to pay bills and keep our sanity.

It’s time for a change! Now more than ever I need to feel better about myself and our situation. I’m going to lose weight, I’m going to better my sanity, better my marriage, better my family, my finances,  and more.

Changes –

  1. Start a savings plan for Christmas next year
  2. Start a cleaning schedule that will help me not feel overwhelmed
  3. Start a workout schedule
  4. Sleep schedule… I need to get up at 3:30 A every morning and bed by 9P
  5. Mental wellness
  6. Morning routine
  7. Be a better step-parent
  8. Journal more –

Regaining my Vigor – Day 1

 

 

 

 

Holiday anticipation

This is only my second Thanksgiving with my husband. Roles at his parents have already been established his dad makes the Turkey, Sister makes the pies and green bean casserole, Mom makes everything else. Every dinner, we bring the Soda and if any needed the chips. I’m rebelling this year… I love to cook and love desserts. I’m making no-bake Reese’s rice krispie cookies, Pumpkin cheesecake balls, and Magic custard cake. I  can’t wait til dinner.

Most of us in his family see each other or speak on a daily basis. Thanksgiving and Christmas are the only time we are all together in one spot. It gets super interesting. The sibling remind the parents of the mischief they got into. The siblings mess with each other like they are still teenagers. They teach their off-spring to mess with their cousins as if they were siblings. There is not a dull second when the Keesling Clan is under one roof. I love seeing my Husband forgetting about the stress of his job, our financials, the outside issues with those we have children with. I love learning more about my husband childhood. I have never been big on the way holidays are commercialized but I LOVE LOVE LOVE this family life and the aroma of a meal cooked with love.

No bake Reeses Krispy treat cookies – these are super easy to make, require little time, and are delish.

You need

  • 4 cups Rice krispies cereal
  • 1 cup Corn syrup, light
  • 1 1/4 cups Peanut butter, creamy
  • 5 Reese’s peanut butter cups, regular sized
  • 1 cup sugar
  • 1/2 cup Milk chocolate chips

Melt Peanut butter, corn syrup and sugar in the microwave I did 2 minutes.

Pour over cereal and mix.

Pour in Chocolate chips and mix. Let cool for a few minutes.

Break up Reeses and mix in the rest.

Spoon onto wax paper and let cool.

Flatten…. done

Magic Custard cake – This is truely magic! I did not think for a second when I placed it in the oven it was going to turn out. It did and was great except I would add a tad more vanilla and would whip the egg whites AFTER putting the other ingredients together.

My no bake cheesecake balls failed –

What can you do with those Tart fruits?

via Daily Prompt: Tart

If you are a follower you know I LOVE pinterest! I love finding new ideas and ways to save money. Today, I give you frugal ideas with Oranges, Lemons, and limes.

Let’s start with a couple oh so yummy recipes

3 ingredient Orange chicken sauce – You need BBQ sauce, orange marmalade, and soy sauce…

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Lemon Parm Pork Chops – You need Pork Chop, Parmesan cheese, panko bread crumbs , lemon, olive oil, and eggs.

2 large eggs
1 cup panko bread crumbs
3/4 cups grated Parmesan cheese
zest of 1 lemon
4-6 boneless thin cut pork loin chops
salt and freshly ground black pepper
6 tbs olive oil
lemon wedges for serving (optional)

Whisk the eggs to blend. Place bread crumbs in another dish.  Place the cheese and lemon zest in a third dish.  Sprinkle the pork chops generously with salt and pepper. Coat the chops completely with cheese and lemon mixture, patting to adhere. Dip the chops into the eggs, then coat completely with the panko bread crumbs, patting to adhere.

Heat up 3-6 tablespoons of olive oil in a large over medium heat. Add pork chops and cook about 6 minutes on each side, or until nice and golden brown and the temperature reaches 150 degrees in the center of the meat.

Fruits are for more than cooking.

Skin care –

Raspberry lemonade lip scrub

Orange vanilla bath salts

Face Masks as seen below

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Lemon, lime, and coconut Stress relief sugar scrub

breakout targeting mask

lemon scrub

Honey pore cleanser

Foot scrub

clear skin as seen below

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Home remedies –

Fruit infused water

add to your bath

Eliminate mucus

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Cleaning and more

Gift ideas for the lemon lover

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The Perfect step-parent is a Mythical being

via Daily Prompt: Mythical

Yesterday, my best friend posted a live rant on Facebook about Nacho Kids. She is a mother of 3 with 3 bonus kids. Her take-away from the Nacho Kids theory was very negative. She believes that anyone believing in this is in the wrong relationship and needs to find a partner with no kids.

I had never heard of this term and had to look it up. From what I read I did not take away such a negative reaction as she. Becoming a blended family is hard and exhausting at times.

According to the theory, it says its okay to not love your Steps as your own. While I love my bonuses as my own… I think its acceptable to say someone else may not. We all have bonded with our own in a way that is impossible to do with a child not ours. Now if you hate your Step… if you resent your step then yes you are in the wrong relationship and it’s selfish for you to stay.

There is a degree of distancing yourself in this theory. It mentions things treating the children differently. Your kid is punished and rewarded to your standards and your spouse takes care of their kids their way. This is where I think I see failure arising.

To a degree, I do agree with each parent handling their own child’s punishments. If the Step-parent seems to be doing the punishments resentment arises. The issue I have is if one set of kids has certain expectations and the others do not, blending a family will never happen. I like the kids to have routines, I like to make the kids try new foods, I like to teach the kids life skills. It’s not been easy with my bonus daughter. Her father was a single dad for 2 years and made excuses for her behavior.

To some degree, her mother is at fault she has no routine. She’s doing homework and eating dinner at 8 PM. Her mother either has her Sunday through Tuesday night and pawns her off on my in-laws Wednesday night so she can drive 2 two hours to see her boyfriend or she will keep her Wednesday, making her do homework in the car and not getting home til after 9. When the child acts out she refuses to punish her instead she calls my husband to punish her.

There was A LOT of push back when I moved in. She has had no structure and didn’t like the changes. Every punishment was too harsh, my husband would say, I was the bad guy. I got sick of hearing “It’s not her fault her mom let’s her or her mom tells her she doesn’t have to listen. BULL-SHIT a nine year old is old enough to understand that once she walks into our home the rules are different. I don’t think it’s a lot to ask a child to throw her trash away, scrape her plate, learn to tie her shoes (yes, at nine)  .I finally got fed up a few weeks ago and made a change. We now have popsicle sticks with random punishments, they will be placed face down and she picks one. She may get a 15 min early bedtime or and entire weekend of going no where, or the four others in between. Since we started this… not a one punishment has been given! No back talk… into bed the second she’s told.. she knows the stakes.

The theory states that the reason for needing to separate yourself is because you seem to notice the Steps bad behavior more and it irritates you more. My husband and I have talked about this and there is truth to the noticing more and the irritations. The thing is it’s not her that I’m actually irritated with. I’m irritated with her mother for not caring. I’m irritated with her father and my father in-law for allowing excuses… my mother in -law actually has my back on the excuses. I get it she has been through hell. Her mother ripped her out of this house and in with a boyfriend. In the last two years she has BEGGED for her mother to keep her for a weekend (we have her every weekend) her mother has “kept” her two weekends in the last two years only to pawn her off on her older brothers dad (yes, instead on keeping her or telling us she didn’t want to keep her she dropped her off with her brother’s dad.) Now her mother wants to move her two hours away which my husband is not allowing for a boyfriend she has known four months.

I understand some anxiety, some resentment towards me but at some point she is going to have to understand that we are not to blame for her mother’s actions and she can’t be allowed to use her mother as an excuse to be completely babied. I want this child to grow up to be successful.. I want her to own up to her actions. I do not want her to play the victim card her entire life. As a mother, I can not just sit back and watch this kid fail, I know none of it is her fault.

I think that if I separated myself from her my marriage would fall apart. We do argue about what each of us expect from her but we talk it out and compromise. I would never be able to ignore things she does. It would have me completely pissed off if I had to choose between making my kids pick up after themselves and do things that she didn’t have to do or just end up being everyone’s maid.

I will never be a perfect parent… I will for sure never be a perfect step-parent. There will be epic fails on my part as a mother and wife. All I can do is try.. try to do what I feel is best for our family.

That being said, to each their own. I can understand how everyone handles stress differently. Everyone runs their homes differently. I want our kids to see our house as more than mom or dads house… I want them to feel at home.