Anyone that says family life is smooth sailing all the time… is lying. I love my husband. I love my kids including my step-kids. To be blunt… they can get on my damn nerves.
The kids and my husband at times, think I’m their maid. Blending families has not been easy. By seven my kids knew the basics to keep me from snapping. Somehow my nine year old step-daughter has not been taught how to locate a trash can, how to scrape a plate, how to make her bed, how to put clothes into a hamper… ya know things that a child should know. When I call her to the neglected issue, she literally looks at me not knowing what the problem is. DRIVES ME NUTS!
Sometimes my husband thinks I’m too hard on her and ask too much. To me as draining as it can be, it is worth the argument! I love this child as she were my own, I hope that later in life she understands I only want her to grow up not expecting everyone to take care of her.
I am a firm believer that each generation is becoming too dependent. Kids have no life skills.. mommy and daddy should support them. There’s a few things I’ve let her slide on but only because shes sharing a room with her sister at the moment.
Grades are also an issue. A BIG issues. We only have her Thursday-Sunday so most of her studies we can’t control. Her Accelerated reader points are rarely acceptable. Fighting with her mother about it.. not really worth it. At nine years old she needs to be held accountable for not doing her homework and not taking her reading seriously. We have no control over what books she brings home but punishments are being handed out. She has had a habit of bringing joke books or grade 1 level books home. If a book is brought home under third grade level she is losing a privilage for the weekend.
I had to explain to all of my children how important reading is. It’s not just homework, its a way of escaping, time traveling if you will.
Unfortunatly, three of my six have been compromised by others. Their father, grandparents, others in life gave them the easy way out and they took it. No chores, having everything handed to them. My husband is afraid that his daughter will fare the same way. I don’t know. She fought a lot at first but she actually has tons of pride when she gets called out for not having to be told.
I find the following Picture to be so true in keeping stress out of our marriage.
There are plenty of things that neither one of us can change about our past or about who we are. Changing the person you are with to me seems completely ignorant. I fell in love with my husband because of who he is, if I have to change anything we were never in love.
In a relationship you must be able to maintain a sense of humor. Life gets crazy. Go with the flow.
There are many times that I feel argumentative and really for no reason. I really do have to take myself to the bedroom and look in our full length mirror. “What is wrong? Am I upset with something they did? someone else? or am I disappointed in myself?”
Making decisions is a must! I quit asking “What sounds good for dinner?” I quit asking “Do you care if I buy ….?” I get the same answer and it gets annoying for the both of us. He doesn’t care what I make. He knows I’m not a huge on spending.